When I fly, I’m always drawn to the SkyMall catalog. And with Christmas just a few days away, I wanted to make sure you were aware of these gifting gems, all currently available at SkyMall:
An aluminum wine-safe that is FAA approved to carry 12 bottles of wine on your flight with you. Their slogan is “Leave no wine behind.” I think it should be “Leave no win-o behind.”
Video Recording Sunglasses with a built-in video camera to let you discreetly record all that you see. Ummm…creepy. These are probably the same people buying “The only picture taking night vision binoculars.”
A portable microwave oven with a DC adapter so you can use it in your car. Isn’t that what drive thru’s are for??
The marshmallow shooter. OK, all kidding aside, I hope this shows up in my stocking.
A remote-controlled tarantula. Yep, I know what I’m getting my sister’s kids for Christmas. She’ll never forgive me.
Adult-sized footed pajamas fits up to 6’7”/260 lbs. I think we may do our family Christmas card pic in these next year. Joel, are you in?
Seat pair from the original Yankee stadium. $1,499 includes the original beer stains and sweat scent. It makes a great addition to the $99 “Freeze-dried grass from the original Yankee stadium.
“The slanket” - Apparently the Snuggie has competition!
The Hollywood Cookie Diet. If anyone has tried this, please contact me personally before I waste $60. So tempting…
Pants Un-heeled. Your “sole-u-tion” to the annoying pants/heel wedgie. What is a pants/heel wedgie? That annoying occurrence when your pants creep under your heel when you’re wearing open-back heels. Where have you been all my life? I am totally buying these.
Solafeet, a small tanning bed for your feet. “Golfers, rid yourself of those ugly sock tan lines forever.” Proof that we really do have many significant worries here in America.
A doggie-DNA test kit. Seriously? What dog wants to find out that his mom was prowling around?
The square root watch. Instead of the hour markers, each is represented as a square root that translates into whole numbers. Ad says “Brainy math types will love this watch, but why should they have all the fun?” This was obviously created by a lonely, brainy math type who for the life of him…can’t figure out why he is alone.
Yes, those are all real. I couldn’t make it up if I tried. Another tribute to good old-fashioned American excess.
Hope this helps as you fight the crowds looking for the perfect last-minute gift.
